Mary Carey, Not Quite So Contrary

Struggling R&B artist Mariah Carey has decided to stall the slide in her career by suing her more-tasteful near-namesake pornstar Mary Carey for an intentional confusion of personalities. As Mary Carey's lawyers say, does Mariah seriously think people will be confused? Mariah might take solace from the news that uber-hip Brazilians CSS are fans of hers (lead singer LoveFoxx wore a Mariah T-shirt at their recent gig in Paris). But she should know that her first name is actually pronounced 'Mar-ee-a'.